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  1. #1
    Violent by Design
    bl4yze's Avatar
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    My teenage son got caught playing Halo 4. Am I a miserable failure?

    Last Tuesday, at about 9:30PM, I got a phone call from the local PD. My son was one of four teenage boys in a vehicle that was pulled over for suspiciously obeying all traffic laws. The police did a routine search of the vehicle, and while they did not find any drugs, alcohol, or weapons, they did find a paper grocery bag containing a copy of Halo 4. My son admitted that it was his. They made him break the disc and fling it off into the woods, gave him a warning, and called me.


    While I am grateful that they didn't cite him for peasantry in a school zone, which they easily could have, I have to admit that I feel like I am responsible for this in some way. As a father, one likes to imagine that his kids are somehow better than those other kids that you hear about messing with jetpacks and crap, but that is not always the case. There were warning signs with my son, and not only did I miss them, I dismissed them.
    In all honesty, he has probably been playing Halo 4 since launch. I remember one time I took him his ritalin for the all-night LAN party he was participating in at his dirty friend's house over in the shantytown across the railroad tracks, and they were playing with boltshots in every loadout.


    "But Dad! It's free wins! There's no other way to win!"


    How could I say no? He would be ridiculed and that damage to his ego just was not worth it to me at the time. I let him stay.


    Fast-forward a couple of years, and I catch him sneaking a copy of Halo 4 into the house. When I confronted him about it, he was ready with his excuses: "I'm playing it ironically" "It's actually really fun" "Lots of people play it" etc


    I let it go.


    But then other things started happening: his grades started falling, his vocabulary shrank, he started wearing hats at stupid angles and calling people "bro," he lost interest in girls and hygiene. He stopped programming, started reading Twilight, and I swear to God that I once heard Limp Bizkit coming from his room. One of his friends even told me that he told a joke from Two and a Half Men at school.


    One night, however, I caught him red-handed. I walked into his room and saw that he was playing on his Xbox, and something was off. He was playing Halo 4 and it was blindingly bad. I reprimanded him.
    "Did I raise a moron? Thatís a horrible game, let me show you a real game."


    He just grumbled. I walked over to put in Halo 2 for him, and he attacked me. He hit me in the jaw, and then started pounding me in the face when I was on the ground. I managed to subdue him with some secret ninja moves I learned in my special forces days and found, to my horror, that he was not just playing Halo 4; he was playing it on MCC! I zip-tied him to his bed and ransacked his room looking for the other copies of Halo 4. He laughed maniacally, and said I would never find them. I looked him dead in the eyes and said: "You have brought dishonor on our family. You will not move from this spot until you tell me where it is." He stared back and did not say a word. I punched him in his stupid face and ransacked the house looking for the other copies. I found them hours later in the toolshed. I destroyed it right there, went up to my son's room brandishing the smashed piece of casual filth, and said, "Never again." I left him tied up there for three days to prove my point.


    Six months passed without further incident. He straightened up, quit drinking Monster, all that shit. I thought I had done my job, but no. I just gave him more of an incentive to hide this disgusting behavior.
    Then this happened, and the proof is incontrovertible: my son is a peasant. And now I am at this crossroads: is my son a peasant despite me, or because of me? Did I force getting a 50 in Halo 2 on him too early? Was that copy of Halo 1 on his 6th birthday really for him, or for me? Am I to blame for all of this?


    No. It's all his fault.

  2. #2
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    JamiDJ's Avatar
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    Re: My teenage son got caught playing Halo 4. Am I a miserable failure?

    OMG this is amazing. *slow clap*
    ۰۪۫J۰۰۪۫a۰۰۪۫m۰۰۪۫i ۰۰۪۫e۰۰۪۫D۰۰۪۫ J۰Purple Army Elite Trooper
    What We Do In Life, Echos in Eternity.

  3. #3
    Violent by Design
    bl4yze's Avatar
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    Re: My teenage son got caught playing Halo 4. Am I a miserable failure?

    Credit goes to this wordsmith

  4. #4

    Re: My teenage son got caught playing Halo 4. Am I a miserable failure?

    Quote Originally Posted by bl4yze View Post
    "Did I raise a moron? That’s a horrible game, let me show you a real game."


    He just grumbled. I walked over to put in Halo 2 for him
    ruined
    "Different name, same fate."
    Quote Originally Posted by WM Feedback View Post
    I (Feedback) tried to flank them Barry Soap style, but it didn't really work out and I just ended up hiding a lot
    Quote Originally Posted by Platinum View Post
    Damn you barry, being seductive to all those recruits by painting vivid, purdy imagery with your words.

  5. #5

    Re: My teenage son got caught playing Halo 4. Am I a miserable failure?

    except Halo 4 is a good game...

    There are other much more dark forms of peasantry, this is not one of them. You must hunt the true peasants...
    "Gamers always believe that an epic win is possible and that it's always worth trying, and trying now."













  6. #6
    Senior Citizen VerbotenDonkey's Avatar
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    Re: My teenage son got caught playing Halo 4. Am I a miserable failure?

    Joined April 2007
    Founder of the LARP
    Founder of the Imperial Office of Naval Intelligence
    Squads led:
    Halo 3 Era: XO of Wolf Squad, CO of Nova Squad
    Halo Reach Era: CO of 1st Marines Platoon, CO of Foxtrot Squad, CO of Wolfpack Squad, CO of REDWATCH Special Forces
    Halo 4 Era: CO of REDWATCH Special Forces, Director of Imperial Office of Naval Intelligence and Project ARTEMIS, CO of the Dark Sail Raiders
    Halo 5 Era: CO of REDWATCH Special Forces





  7. #7

    Re: My teenage son got caught playing Halo 4. Am I a miserable failure?

    Quote Originally Posted by NervyDestroyer View Post
    except Halo 4 is a good game...
    Quote Originally Posted by THExSPIDERMAN View Post
    Such is life.

    Reach Tage

  8. #8
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    Re: My teenage son got caught playing Halo 4. Am I a miserable failure?

    Quote Originally Posted by HighLight View Post
    ۰۪۫J۰۰۪۫a۰۰۪۫m۰۰۪۫i ۰۰۪۫e۰۰۪۫D۰۰۪۫ J۰Purple Army Elite Trooper
    What We Do In Life, Echos in Eternity.

  9. #9
    Senior Citizen Silko's Avatar
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    Re: My teenage son got caught playing Halo 4. Am I a miserable failure?

    Quote Originally Posted by NervyDestroyer View Post
    except Halo 4 is a good game...

    REDD or BLUE Resistance comes through!
    Quote Originally Posted by Mythonian View Post
    Silko isn't an innate troublemaker, and doesn't intentionally break the rules.
    Co-Founder of the Resistance
    Undefeated on Reach

  10. #10

    Re: My teenage son got caught playing Halo 4. Am I a miserable failure?

    Halo 4 has a better story then Halo CE,2 and 3

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